My December
by Queen Isa
Summary: Chris thinks about his relationship with Piper.


This is my December This is my time of the year This is my December This is all so clear This is my December This is my snow covered home This is my December This is me alone   
  
Christopher Perry Halliwell sat alone on the snow-covered roof of his ancestral home, thinking of the things that had made him who he was. His hands were warmly encased in hand knitted gloves his mother had knitted as she was pregnant with him – or mini-him, and his body carefully shielded from the cold snowy air that made ice crystals formed in the air as he breathed in a dark green ski jacket that matched his dark green eyes and coal black ski pants to match his coal-black hair. He loved the snow. He had loved, as a child, to be warmly tucked into bed by his mother and listen to the snowfall and lull him into a gentle sleep.  
  
And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed.   
  
He missed that. He missed her. He missed the way she smiled and laughed, the nonsense song she sung to him each night. The song she had grown up with, and now passed down to him, in a futile attempt in giving him a ''normal'' childhood, like she had had. Even thought she tried so hard, he never did have a ''normal'' childhood. She was ripped from his life in one unforgettable night, forever.  
  
And I Take back all The things I said To make you Feel like that And I Just wish that I didn't feel Like there was Something I missed And I Take back all the Things I said to you.   
  
He hated hurting her. He hated leaving her. He hated not being with her. He hated finding her again, and her not knowing what a precious, short part in his life she had played. He hated not being able to tell her the truth. He hated lying to her, for in his past, he had told her everything. He hated having to tell her the truth, and killing her thoughts of a ''normal'' childhood for her babies. Most of all, he hated not having been able to save her from the pain. The pain of knowing it was he who had told her that she had 'failed' at her opinion as a mother. The pain of death.  
  
And I give it all away Just to have somewhere To go to Give it all away To have someone To come home to.   
  
He had given away his fiancée to death, in order to save her from having to go through all that pain again. He had given up his rightful place in his time to come back and claim his, yet unclaimed, rightful place as his mother's son. He had given away his childhood to saving her, a childhood that had really been lost the day she had died.  
  
This is my December These are my snow-covered trees This is me pretending This is all I need.   
  
Chris Halliwell breathed out slowly, thinking deeply. He didn't just need to be at her side, he needed her. He needed her to be there for him, as she had been before. He needed his father to be there for her.....and for him.  
  
This is my December This is my time of the year This is my December This is all so clear   
  
He had nearly lost her again. That had made him stop and freeze up with old memories he thought cured at the sight of her. He had nearly lost his nerve, then. He had almost broken down and cried, telling her of all his pain, of all his suffering, of all his love. For her. He had almost cried, the need to be in her arms again almost overwhelming. The thought of losing her, so soon after he had found her almost drove him to do the impossible: tell him who he was.  
  
And I give it all away Just to have somewhere To go to Give it all away To have someone To come home to   
  
Christopher Perry Halliwell caught sight of his pregnant mother walking up the snow-filled drive of their home, her sisters supporting her on the slippery, ice covered drive, laughing.  
  
The urge burned deeper in his heart.  
  
One day Mom. He thought, smiling at the scene in front of him, so reminiscent of those from his early childhood. One day I will tell you everything.  
  
Hi. What did you think of it? Please review... I need to know! Queen Isa PS. I don't own Charmed Or the song. 


End file.
